How to Identify Your Negative Emotions

I think our physiological response to excitement & anxiety can be very similar ... What the research shows is that when we're torn between what we're feeling but we label it [excitement], the outcomes are more positive ... When we label what we're feeling as anxiety, it's more negative.

The times when I was the most resentful is when I'm deep into burnout, I'm exhausted, and I don't think everyone else is working as hard as I am. And it turns out that I'm not mad because people aren't working as hard; I'm envious because they're taking care of themselves.

This idea that language doesn't communicate solely; it also shapes ... The metaphor that comes to mind is if you're baking cookies, you know, your grandma's best recipe, and the flavor changes radically dependent on the bowl you use. I mean, that's the power of language.

Now, when I feel envious, I don't say 'What is this person doing to piss me off?' ... Now, I ask, 'What do you need that you're afraid to ask for?'

I think there are so many people out there, yourself included, trying to make a dent in a world that says how we feel doesn't matter when really nothing matters if we don't understand how we feel.

It's a huge part of the mythology around emotion that if we look it in the eye, it gives it power ... The reality is, if we look it in the eye and name it, it gives us power.

As someone who has studied and written about shame for 15 years, I can tell you that no one wants to talk about it ... People will do just about anything to avoid pain, including cause pain.

I think it was probably four or five years ago when we started seeing some of the research on how language doesn't just communicate emotion but shape it ... We are individually and collectively in trouble if we don't have language.

Worriers believe that worrying is helpful; it's not. Worriers believe that they cannot change that about them; we can.